My Progress Bar Detailed Documentation - Notepad

Obviously such a powerful tool would not be complete without documentation to address the many questions that are inevitably raised: If you still have questions that have not been answered, feel free to email me at contact@myprogressbar.com and assuming it is not an inappropriate question, I will add it to the list below.


How do I get back to the progress bar?
Do you have a Windows application that does this?
What is your ultimate goal in life?
Where can I find your press releases?
The progress bar doesn't seem to work. Can you fix it?
Why does it take so long to install the critical patch?
What do I do now?
I don't have internet. What is this?
How do you afford to host such an advanced site?
How do I give you lots of money?
What's the best ice cream?
I don't have a job.
Can this tool help me find a wife?
Will staring at the screen make the bar move faster?
Is this life imitating Waiting For Godot?
Is this available in a Mac / Linux / Windows 7 / some other layout?

How do I get back to the progress bar?
I understand that you are anxious to return to check your progress. Click here to go back.

Do you have a Windows application that does this?
Yes I do. Download from CNET or this website (more sketchy).

What is your ultimate goal in life?
My ultimate goal in life is to make My Progress Bar the most downloaded application of ALL time from CNET's Download.com.

Where can I find your press releases?
Unfortunately, we only have one press release right now. Click here to go view it.

The progress bar doesn't seem to work. Can you fix it?
The tool will only work if you have javascript enabled. Please do this.

Why does it take so long to install the critical patch?
Have you tried restarting your computer? If that fails, try again. Keep trying until it works.

What do I do now?
Tell your boss that IT had to install a critical patch so until that's done you can't do any work. For extra fun, load the progress bar onto your boss's and coworkers' computers too. Hilarity is bound to ensue.

I don't have internet. What is this?
The good news is that you can download this tool here and use it on your computer without an internet connection! I don't know how this information is going to get to you, though. Unless by this question you meant you don't know what the internet is. In that case, let me explain to you that the internet is a series of interconnected pipes.

How do you afford to host such an advanced site?
As you can tell, this site is extremely advanced. Fortunately, my father was a very wealthy cocoa merchant in Abidjan,the economic capital of Ivory Coast before he was poisoned to death by his business associates on one of their outing to discus on a business deal. When my mother died on the 21st October 1984, my father took me and my younger brother HASSAN special because we are motherless. Before the death of my father on 30th June 2002 in a private hospital here in Abidjan. He secretly called me on his bedside and told me that he has a sum of $12.500.000 (Twelve Million, five hundred thousand dollars) left in a suspense account in a local Bank here in Abidjan, that he used my name as his first Daughter for the next of kin in deposit of the fund.... Just send me money (see below).

How do I give you lots of money?
Click below


What is the best ice cream?
Vanilla.

I don't have a job.
That's not a question.

Can this tool help me find a wife?
Yes. Wait, what? ... Maybe you could try inviting that girl you've been eyeing from down the hall to check out your progress bar...

Will staring at the screen make the bar move faster?
Remember years ago when people used to download material. Remember the thrill of watching that blue bar get closer to the end. Remember the anticipation. Did staring help then? The jury's still out on that one.

Is this life imitating Waiting For Godot? If so, faceless progress bar, I rather admire your faintly nihilistic affinity with the everday. - Z.S.
Oh Godot, where art thou? ... But yes, it is rather nihilistic that you and I, the faceless progress bar, wait together day in and day out for your workday to end. Perhaps you should go back to the progress bar and check your day's status again. I think it may have changed.

Is this available in a Mac / Linux / Windows 7 / some other layout?
Who do you think I am? Santa Claus? ... In all seriousness, though, if you build a different skin for the Progress Bar, I'll happily host it for you. Just email me above. Otherwise, you can download the Windows version here.